Do phone sex operators have Employee of The Month awards?

Do they?

Just wondering.

Not for, you know, any particular reason.

Just curious.

A co-worker was pacing about, pissed that he was wasting so much time as the meeting he's trying to finish keeps getting interrupted, and I told him to chill, because isn't being in my presence rewarding enough?

Which led to the conversation topic he brings up often, about how much he loves my phone voice. He's not the first co-worker to mention it, but he is the one that feels the need to mention it more than once. He says semi-inappropriate things about it, like hinting that I could work in the Reach Out And Touch Someone (And Yourself) Phone Sex Business (my words, not his, he's not quite so... specific about it. Heh.).

So he's pacing, I'm pretending to be offended that my presence isn't uplifting enough, and he says that he'd rather hear me over the phone.

I knew what he meant, but my brain still leapt at the implication it found dancing about. Sheesh, am I that hideous to look at that you'd rather hear me than see me?

A: Not that hideous.

So we're talking about how sexy my phone voice is (which is only sexy when I'm talking in my I-Hope-No-One-Overhears-Me low voice, otherwise I sound like a 14 yr old, which dear god I hope is not the voice he's talking about, pretty sure its not...) and he's talking about how much he enjoys it, the voice, which I really don't want to know, because I don't want to be flattered by it (seeing as how we're at work, otherwise, bring it on!) and I really don't want to know exactly how he enjoys it because that's best between a man and his pants, particularly a co-worker man. And I tell him as much, that he can keep that enjoyment to himself, please.

But he continues, and says something about how I'd be top employee. I'd be Employee of the Month material! Which made me laugh. And then wonder... what kind of incentive programs do phone sex operator businesses have? Are there yearly bonuses? Summer retreats? Because that would be awesome.

EMPLOYER:

Congratulations Lisa! You have a high approval rating with the highest percentage of return callers! Requests for you are shooting through the roof! You're making us a butt load of money! So you've won this month's prestige Employee of the Month Award! Here's a twenty dollar gift certificate to Burger King!

ME:

*glee*


Not that I'm looking for a career change or anything. I wouldn't last five seconds in that job before busting out in a fit of giggles.