Friday, December 31, 2004

Like the old saying goes, you can't pick the voices that populate your head...

Me: I've got to change the look of this blog.

Voice #1: Thank Elvis! I thought you'd never say that!

Me: I know, I know. I started to change things around a bit but stopped during all the busy holiday hoopla.

Voice #2: Hoopla. Hoopla hoopla hoopla.

Me: I'll try and work on it next week sometime.

V1: Thank Elvis!

Me: Why do you keep saying that?

V1: What?

Me: 'Thank Elvis'. What does it mean?

V1: It means thank Elvis. As in thank God.

V2: I don't get it.

V1: Elvis is God!

Me: Dude, you can't say that.

V1: I can if its true.

Me: But its not true.

V1: Do you know everything?

Me: Um... no.

V1: See then!

Me: See what?

V1: How do you know Elvis isn't God?

Me: Because he's NOT!!!

V2: Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Somebody forgot to take their chill pill this morning.

Me: I forgot to shove my boot up your asses this morning, that's what I forgot.

V1: How very mean of you.

V2: Quite.

V1: Which isn't surprising since you're trying to hurt us with this atrocious blog design.

V2: I kind of like it.

Me: Thank you.

V2: But then, I do have such a horrid sense of style.

Me: Is it possible to retract my earlier 'thank you'?

V1: No. You're stuck with it. Just like I'm stuck looking at this ugly site.

Me: You're not the only one.

V1: True. Which means you are exceptionally cruel, aren't you. Does it get you're jollies in a tingle to think of all the innocent children you've blinded with this monstrosity of a website design?

Me: That's a bit much don't you think.

V1: No.

Me: Oh. Well, I don't have jollies. So there.

V2: Jollies jollies jollies.

V1: I just figured out what your problem is. You have jollie envy.

Me: There's no such thing.

V1: How do you know? Huh?

Me: Well...

V1: Huh?

Me: Uh...

V2: Ooooh! Gotcha again!

Me: @#&$%

V1: Thank you. Thank you very much.

Dear Rain,

Rain, rain, go away.

Come again another day.

Like maybe next Sunday.

No, Sunday I have to run to the grocery store and I hate getting drenched while I load the groceries in my car. So that day is no good.

And I'll probably be doing laundry on Monday. The washer and dryer are in a little room on the other side of the parking lot at my apartment complex, which means if it rains I'll get all my just-dried clothes wet again. Which, trust me, is no fun whatsoever.

So how about Tuesday? Does Tuesday work for you? I've got an opening between... oh, say... 9am and 2pm. I can squeeze you in there. Sound good? Okay, I'll pencil you in for Tuesday at 9am. Now remember, there's a cancellation fee if you don't call to reschedule 24 hours prior to the appointment.

Thank you for your cooperation.

The Currently Dry Loon

In an effort not to do too much real work today I present to you the first blog post of the day

Dude! I can't believe I'm at work right now. Driving into work today on the freeways was weird. There were so few cars on the road it felt like I was going to work on a Saturday or Sunday. And an hour ago I was given a list of vendors to call but no one's in their offices to take my calls! Well, I did talk to one human, who was part of a skeleton crew, and he said there was no one there who could help me with my questions. Darn it! Everybody's at home today! At least I get Monday off. Which I think I'd prefer, because everyone else will be at work then and I won't be. Perfect time to go shopping me thinks. :)

I asked the boss if I could go home "sick" a couple hours early today and he said sure, no problem. So yeah to that!

And the countdown begins... 3 hours of work left... 3 hours 59 minutes and 17 seconds of work left...

I'm really looking forward to tonight. The HB and I are meeting up with a friend and together we're going to hang out at Universal CityWalk. Which is why I'm leaving work early, so we can get there early before it gets tooooooo crowded. It's going to be a blast!

I had thought about upgrading my piece of crap cell phone for a fancy shmancy picture phone so I could take pictures of everything tonight. Then I remembered I have no money. That's always a bummer reminder.

But maybe... maybe I could charge more money to my credit card without it buckling under the weight of money owed... maybe I could sign my cell phone life away for two years and get El Cheapo Picture Phono. That's the trouble with the current phone. Cheapo = Crappo.

Maybe I'll leave an extra hour early and go peruse my options at the cell phone store... because taking pictures tonight might just turn into a must. There could be Kodak moments everywhere! What if David Lee Roth (who's performing at CityWalk tonight) runs into my friend and asks her to dance up on stage with him? I'd need a picture of that! And what if the HB gets mugged by small alien tourists? I'd need a picture of that! And what if there are drunk people being complete morons? I could always use a few more pictures of that.

Ah yes, I think I've nearly convinced myself. (Notice it didn't take much.) I'll just look at pictures of fancy shmancy picture phones online to see if that seals the deal.

Thursday, December 23, 2004

is it time to go home yet?

Twenty minutes left...

Twenty minutes left before I can run out the office screaming 'I'm free! I'm free!'. Why did work get all hectic again right before Christmas? I tell ya, The Man just never lets up. I didn't have time to do any of my normal work stuff (which was a lot more than usual because I had to prepare for the few days I'll be missing next week... oops) because a big IMPORTANT PROJECT was dropped in my lap that had to be done AS SOON AS POSSIBLE (!). And fellow desk-neighbor's lap as well. A project almost identical to the IMPORTANT PROJECT that was dropped in our laps yesterday. I swear, its amazing this company is still functioning as well as it is with all the headless chicken running we do around here.

Ten minutes left...

Ten minutes left before I can leave and drive home in the monster Santa Ana winds that are blowing like crazy out there. Hopefully there aren't a lot of semis out there on my freeways. I hate driving past them as the wind tries to push you under its wheels.

If thunder is "God bowling", is the 30 mile an hour winds out there God farting? Just a thought.

Five minutes left...

Five minutes left until I can get away from people asking me silly questions. And I can go home and watch part five of A&E's showing of Pride and Prejudice. I've been wanting to watch this forever and have only now gotten around to it - when it's free and on tv without commercials! Only downside is its in six one hour parts. And I want to see it all now!!!

I <3 Colin Firth

*dreamy sigh*

Three minutes left...

Three minutes left until my xmas vacation starts. I'll be driving up tomorrow to my parents house. And I'll get to hang out with a bunch of family. I can't wait! The poor HB will be driving up xmas morning after he gets off work (poor thing has to work xmas eve night/xmas morning!) to join us. And I don't have to be back to work until Wednesday! Woooo hoooo!
Happy holidays to anyone wondering by for a quick read. :)

Thursday, December 16, 2004


Trigger #106: Complete the Paragraph

If I had time to be more involved in the community I would....

... raise special companion chipmunks and then sell them (only two easy payments of just $9.99 a month!) to single child families. Because every child should have a sibling to play with, whether it's a human or a cute furry rodent. I would teach the chipmunks to play dodge ball and hopscotch and slug bug (because these companion chipmunks will be fully versed in dealing with long boring family road trips). I would teach the chipmunks how to braid hair and tell corny fart jokes. I would teach the pseudo-sibling chipmunks when to tattle, but most importantly when not to tattle, so that the Stick It To The Man bond between the siblings will grow and flourish. The chipmunks, before they graduate the program and get placed with a family, will be going door-to-door selling assorted packages of nuts to raise money for the many community needs.

If only I had the time...

Wednesday, December 15, 2004

Tis the season...

I'm in a festive mood here at work. Which is why I just taped this picture up on the window above my desk:

It's a picture of little baby cheeses! Get it? No? Its sort of an inside joke here in the office. The New Guy was telling this lame joke earlier this month about going to the store and buying those little individually wrapped cheeses. Said he was going to make a nativity scene with the 'little baby cheeses'. Fa la la la la ha ha ha ha.

Okay, so it was probably a lot funnier hearing it in person instead of reading it.

I'm just using typing as an excuse for not doing anything else at the moment. I'm having one of those 'I really don't want to do any work today' kind of moments (which are happening more and more frequently this month). There's lots to do, and I just can't seem to get myself to do it. I've done some little things, the unimportant no-stress-y things. Now its time to tackle the Big Scary Pain In The Ass things. Oy to the vey. Guess I should try and shake myself from this food coma I'm in. Because you see, The Company hired someone to cook us all a big bbq lunch and I'm so stuffed on tri-tip, chicken, ceasar salad and buttery roll that I can't possibly be expected to work in this condition.

Encouraging remarks from the peanut gallery: "Rightly so, ol' chap chappette."

Thank you, my lovely peanuts. Thank you for your support.

Oh, and did I mention the Krispy Kremes? The box of fresh and deliciously warm Krispy Kreme donuts that were dropped off in the office right after lunch? Heaven. Pure delightful sugary heaven. Mmmm... donuts.
I know what I'm going to do. It's such a lovely day outside; I think I'll go for a walk. Just around the parking lot to go grab something from my car, I don't have too long of a break coming, but a little bit of exercise and fresh air will do me good. Mmmm... nature. Then I'll exercise any excess calories with a bit more typing. :) Can't jump back into work too quickly now can I? I might sprain something.

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

tuesday is chooseday

Would you rather be...

1. a garbage collector OR a fry cook at a greasy spoon restaurant?

Oh I would so rather be a fry cook. I wouldn't care if the local united cockroach front home office was based out of my greasy kitchen. It would beat picking up garbage any day. Because there's some nasty garbage out there that will fry every last one of you nose hairs off. And I rather like my nose hairs thank you very much.

2. The person who repairs downed power lines OR the person who cleans the shark tanks (while they're still in it) at aquariums?

I love water stuff, and would love having a 'getting in the water' type job. But with sharks swimming about getting all up in my business? Eek! If they were the kind that wouldn't bite, even on extreme PMS days, I'd probably do that job. If not, I'll repair downed power lines. Because that would mean I'd be outside a lot. And that would seem like a dream job on a day like today. (It's sunny yet slightly chilly and oh so pretty outside and I can't go out and play! Bummer dude!)

3. The person who does makeup on dead people for open casket services OR the person who has to scoop the ashes of a dead person into an urn?

I'm horrible at doing my own makeup, I can't imagine how I'd screw up someone else's face. I wouldn't want the poor dead person to rot away with a horrible makeup job. I think I'd rather scoop up the ashes.

4. A beat cop in new york OR a navy SEAL on a covert mission?

A SEAL! Because they kick major bad guy ass and get to play with high tech fancy gizmos.

Saturday, December 11, 2004

*knock knock knock* HOuseKEEping!

excuse the mess. i'm doing a bit of housekeeping. a bit of springwinter cleaning. sort of a rearranging and redesigning. basically the blog was feeling kind of blah, and felt the need to go shopping for a pretty dress. the new style doesn't exactly fall into the 'pretty' category, but its different. and different will do just fine for a much needed uplifting.

i'm keeping the same color scheme for the moment, mainly because finding all new colors would be way too time consuming at the moment. besides, its green, and tis the season to be greeny. :)

if you notice a link isn't working or an image isn't showing feel free to point and laugh it out in the comments. if those still work after all the dress trying ons...

Thursday, December 09, 2004

don't worry, the spider didn't get me!

It's been awhile since I posted. (And one of the last posts I wrote sort of mentioned the same thing. D'oh!)

Yeah, well, so anyways... Loony's back... back again... and now she has that stupid eminem song stuck in her head. Maybe that can account for the reason she's typing in third person.

Wow. Last time I posted was the 11th, right in the middle of NaNoWriMo, a.k.a. The Day of The Infamous Spider Assault. I remember being way behind in my word count and stressing over it.


I paused in my typing to take a sip of coffee (yes, at 2:45 pm - is that weird?) and while I'm sipping I noticed I had subconsciously stuck my pinkie out. I'm drinking from a Styrofoam cup (yes, I hear the earth weeping at those words - sorry earth dude) with my friggin pinkie out like I'm royalty or something drinking from the finest of china-ware. What's up with that? Just thought I'd share.


The rest of the month was spent writing and procrastinating from writing. I did some major cranking out of novel words the last two weeks and managed to finish. Yay! Some of the words were even in complete sentences. Yay! But dude, the writing was horrible. It really was. I'd think of a sentence and as I was about to type it my internal editor would say 'ew, that's awful, don't even bother wasting typing muscles for that because you'll just have to delete it if you ever want to edit this'. I couldn't turn the internal editor off completely - I couldn't stop thinking that I needed to rewrite my sentences to make them sound better - but I did learn to ignore the nagging bitch for the month of November, a hard yet necessary step for completing the NaNoWriMo challenge. At least for me it seems. I reached the 50,000 word mark, but the story is an incomplete rough draft - about as rough as a porcupine's butt. Sigh. I had so hoped to improve upon last years attempt.

I had also hoped that I would learn from last year and not save the major chunk of writing for the very end. Didn't happen though. I wrote a little over two fifths of the novel during the last four days of the month. Eek! I'd like to think that I did my best writing under all the pressure but I'm not sure. I haven't gone back to it yet to see exactly what I wrote. ("It's all a big blur!") I do know that all that last minute writing sucked my brain dry and left the spirit weary. I wandered around aimlessly for the next couple of days, doing mindless chores, such as washing the dirty dishes that had spontaneously multiplied like horny little bunnies in my week's absence from the kitchen. ("I can't do the dishes! I'm a writer! I'm on a deadline!")

I just love throwing out writer-speak like that. I have a writing deadline!

*gets all tingly inside*

So my mind's been a blank for about a week now. Sure, there's been the random 'ooh, grilled cheese sandwich!' food thought or 'snoopy socks!' wardrobe consideration thought or 'boy, the HB sure is cute when he's hyper/sleepy/wearing socks on his ears' boyfriend thought (plus a few others even less interesting than the previous ones mentioned) but that's been pretty much it. Until last night that is. Now all these weird and random ideas are starting to float around in my head. I have to start writing some of this stuff down so as to make way for the brilliant money maker ideas so hopefully some of the thoughts will get written up and posted here. Not the money maker ones though, I'll be hoarding that shit yo!

Thursday, November 11, 2004

i saw the sign. and it opened up my mind. and nearly made me pee my pants.

i'm writing this entry in a chair that's as far away from the desk, and the spider that tried to kill me, as possible.

i'm way behind in my word count for NaNoWriMo. so i set this big lofty goal for myself (3300 words in one day!) and when i finally got to the computer i just couldn't get myself to open the word document and start typing. i was thinking the mental road block was a sign that i shouldn't be writing right now. i should go do the dishes or something until the muse is back and ready to work. but then i thought, 'dishes? i don't wanna do no stinkin' dishes!' because man do they stink.

so i thought to get me in the writing mood i'd just write up a little blog entry and ramble on about what i've been doing for the last couple of days. that got kind of pushed to the side when i found out there's a new Harry Potter Magical Trading Card Game going on. (new cards to find! wheeee!). when i found all the cards i was going to find today i thought i might as well start the blog entry.

and then it happened.

the awful, awful event that nearly stopped my heart.

a spider, at least an inch long, rappelled down its little spider rope NO MORE THAN A COUPLE INCHES FROM MY FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

boy did i freak out like a lunatic. normally i'm okay around spiders. spiders that are a safe distance away. not dropping down right in front of my face! the thing was so close i could have counted the hairs on its legs. no joke. *shudder*

so this massive evil insect dropped down for a little hello, and my first instinct was to swat the little web rope because ew i didn't want to touch the actual spider! then, as i'm making contact with the web rope, i get a flash of the little sticky web sticking to my hand and the spider, who's butt would still be attached to the web rope, landing on me and ew i'd really be touching it then! that's when i screamed like a little girl.

the spider dropped on my nice little blanket i'll never be able to use again because ew what if the spider laid eggs in the little holes! then i jumped up and got as far away as i could in this little apartment o' mine and tried to get my heart beating again.

so i'm taking that as a sign that i shouldn't be sitting here working on my novel. if fucking dive bombing spiders isn't a sign i don't know what is. computer's full of tempting stuff anyways. like games and internet things. so i'm going to go sit on the couch (after its carefully inspected for killer rapelling spiders) and write out my next scene on paper. i'd wanted to avoid that, because this weekend i'm going to be out of town and will have to write a bunch of stuff by hand *weeps for the loss of lap top coolness*. its going to take forever to type all this stuff up. but hopefully, if i get my super duper bonus word count written today, it won't matter later.

well, the update will have to wait for tomorrow. i think i just spotted the spider. i'm putting my heavy duty sneakers on and taking that bastard out.

Wednesday, November 03, 2004

Tragedies and Epiphanies: A Belated Day 2 Update of the Adventures of Loon in NaNoWriMo Land

i didn't write anything yesterday. nada. zippo. zilchinsky.

i went and voted and was flying high off of that. then i went to the bank and depostited money so i can pay rent. putting money in the bank always blows a friendly breeze up my skirt so i was in a right jolly mood by the time i got home.

even despite the fact that all day i'd been fretting over my NaNoWriMo story. after thinking about it i realized it was too much of an infant, still a little too preemy for me to play with. see, what i need to do with the story is pull some hard core back yard world wrestling federation moves on it, and the story idea just isn't developed enough for that kind of play. so i started doubting everything and got a severe case of writer's block. blah.

and then i turned on the tv and watched some news and some election updates and the thought of bush in charge for another four years was just too damn depressing for me. that and the fact that all those states passed stupid anti-gay marriage laws killed the earlier high i was on and brought back the sucky thoughts of my sucky story. i thought about writing about something else, but nothing of use came to mind.

the funk i was in for the rest of the night was quite funky indeed.

but then the morning came. and i realized that it doesn't matter if the story idea sucks. i just need to roll with it and see where it takes me, whether it be to Awesome Town or Sucksville. i was ready and raring to continue on this story path, but still, in the back of my mind, i was entertaining the thought of changing stories. only marginally entertaining, but still, the thought was there.

so i'm sitting here at my work desk when all of a sudden... WHAMMO! an awesome snippet of an idea popped into my head. yesterday, while in the funk and trying to think of a new novel topic, i was trying to decide what story i had in my to tell. what did i want to write about. what genre, what style, yadda yadda yadda. i wasn't in the mood to talk back to myself so i never got an answer. but this new idea of mine, its so perfect. its a combo of two things i want to write stories about. its just so... so... awesome. :)

so i'm kind of excited about this new story i'm going to be writing. i have no idea what's going to happen, or quite what the world(s) and characters are going to be like, but it doesn't matter. because i'm looking forward to finding all this stuff out! i've already scribbled two pages worth of notes. and i might even be able to use some of what i wrote the other day. woohoo!

i'm a little behind, but its only day three, and i feel a huge writing spurt in my future. hopefully that's not just the rumbly in my tumbly i'm feeling. :)

think i'll go take a coffee break and write a little.

Tuesday, November 02, 2004

i can't think of a relevant title for this post because i'm hungry & mr. greedy next to me is eating something yummy smelling & i can't think straight

I'm working new hours now. The BossMan wants extended coverage so that some whiney babies at work have less to whine about. So I'm coming in an hour and a half later than usual. And it sucks. I think he might want me to come in at 8, and work until 4:30, but I'm working under the assumption I can work 7:30 to 4, and will continue to do so until he tells me otherwise. Because while traffic is a bitch at 4, it's a mega bitch just a half hour later.

*crosses fingers that boss doesn't tell otherwise*

Sure, the new hours means I get to sleep in more, but I liked waking up early! Sort of. At least the payoff was well worth it.

Leaving work earlier than most people = less traffic and more time to do things before the evening sets in = fabulousness!

When I first started working here, over 4 years ago, I started at 7 am. A couple months later, when I started going to school, I started coming in at 6am. Even after I stopped going to school I still came in at 6am because I liked the hours. So for the last couple years I've been driving to work in the dark. When daylight savings went into effect (or out of effect) each year, I'd be driving to work as the sun rose, so everything was half lighted.

But now with this new schedule I'm driving in to work at 7 am. And with the time change it more like 8am. And holy cow it's so freaking bright outside at 8 in the morning! I knew this, or course, it's just that the scenery I'm used to has suddenly changed and I was a little mesmerized by it.

I can't remember the last time I drove into work when it was so light outside. Well, besides yesterday. It's a weird feeling - a feeling like I'm late for work. The sun is out in full force; I should be at my desk! Locked away inside and staring out at the bright sunny day, not out and about driving!

So the drive to work today (and yesterday) was a little surreal. But I liked it. I like driving when it's nice and sunny out. With a chilly breeze blowing outside. Makes me want to roll the window down and cruise around aimlessly. :)

Monday, November 01, 2004

The Adventures of Loon in NaNoWriMo Land: Day 1

It's the end of Day 1 of NaNoWriMo. At least it is for me. My brain is tired and fuzzy and while sometimes that's prime time for the silly muse to make her appearance and write sublime wackiness, tonight my brain isn't going to be host to anything. Muse or interesting thought or location of lucky underwear. Yes, that's right. I typed lucky underwear. There's a pair of lucky undies hiding somewhere in my apartment that, when I wear them, magical things happen. Lucky magical things. Like I win lotto scratchers. And I avoid major traffic accidents on highways cause by nasty evil Santa Ana winds tipping over trucks that really ruin my morning (which happened this morning... because I was sans lucky undies)

And... well... actually I have no lucky undies. Dammit. Otherwise I'd wear them all the time and do nothing but play lotto scratchers. And I'd be known as that Crazy Lady Who Wears Her Underwear On Her Head and Hangs Out In The Quicky Mart All Day. And yes, you have to wear the undies on your head. That's the only way the magic works. Don't ask me why, I don't make the rules.

I didn't write much today. Only a little over a thousand words. And most of that was at work, written on the backs of miscellaneous paper work I was going to throw away in the Save A Tree Recycle Bin. Since I only came up with the idea for my 'novel' this morning around 10 am or so, I think I got off to a pretty good start.

I was so stressing there for the last couple of days. Couldn't decide what I was going to write about. Kept going back and forth, back and forth between about 4 different ideas. Then today, during a coffee break, I was going over the different ideas in my head, and suddenly my brain took a left turn and drove on to New Idea-ville. The new story idea is sort of a make up of several other ideas I had jotted down in my handy dandy little notebook. They were floating around in my head and took the threat of a mild panic attack on my part to coalesce into something usable. I wasn't close to a panic attack, but I threatened the muse with one if she didn't come through for me anytime soon. And it worked. Go figure.

After that first jolt of 'hey, this idea could work!' I've had other bits of inspiration, writing them down in scribbles at work and then typing them up here at home. And now my brain is shut down for business. The Do Not Disturb sign is hanging on the door and a wake up call has been placed with the front desk.

G'night brain. G'night lame-o NaNoWriMo story. G'night blog. G'night to anyone who reads this when g'night still applies. G'night John Boy. G'night Mighty Muse Midge. Sleep tight.

- Hours spent scribbling ideas down at work: off and on while playing Paper Work Dodgeball
- Hours spent converting scribbles to computer typed words: .75
- Words typed for NaNoWriMo novel: 1158
- Words typed in blog entry that can’t be counted towards novel count darn it!: 549
- Mental status: cloudy with a slight chance of rain

Friday, October 15, 2004

For my first action in office as your Evil Lord Dictator I declare today Stupid Question Day

does the healthy fruitiness of the raisins that i'm eating for lunch cancel out the carbonated sugariness of the dr. pepper that i'm drinking?

its a pretty good lunch, just the raisins and the dr. p. it really is. despite the fact that i'm consuming them at my desk. too much work. gotta keep on working! and it is such hard work being the evil lord dictator that i am. see, i demanded a sacrifice earlier, and my subjects have readily tried to appease me. they're sacrificing a village of virgin papers, all sheet thin and stark white and pure, into the mouth of the volcano Mount InkjetPrinter. the volcano sucks them in, deflowers them with a little bit of ink tattooing and then spits them back out.

so yeah, busy busy day.

i'm going to try and get out of here at 4 today so that i have time to go to the post office before it closes. they're holding some mysterious package for me because it didn't fit in my mailbox. i have an idea who its from, but i didn't order anything from them, so really need to go and pick it up so i can get mad and frustrated and cuss at them for being stupid. its been almost a week since i got the little paper notice and the not knowing who exactly sent it is getting on my nerves.

the mail people don't through mail away if you don't claim them in a timely fashion, do they? i hope not. that doesn't seem very post office-ily to me.

i've heard that you shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth, so i was wondering... what about the horsey's other orifices? i mean, if i'm given a horse i'm going to be weary about its origins. because who in their right mind would give me a horse. so i'm gonna wanna check it out, see if it has a big trap door in its tummy, see if there are any sneaky trojans hiding out inside. i've seen Troy. i know how that story ends! and its baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.

just like the carbonation in this dr pepper. its making me want to burp. and that's baaaaaaaaaaaad. because i'm in an office with a bunch of guys that have never heard me burp before. its a special moment i want to save for a later date, until we've all gotten to know each other better. i guess i'm just old fashioned that way. :)

Thursday, October 14, 2004

work is driving me crazy, and the bastards are doing it in run down little metro too

well, the auditeers are here. they arrived monday and this is the first break i've had to write this. well, i've had other breaks, but they've been rudely interrupted by the boss man coming in. very inconsiderate. so i've started this post a few times... and have quickly hit the little close x button a few times, which makes me look very busy. i think. either that or extremely guilty about something.

so the auditeers are here. and they aren't as scary as i thought they'd be. they're horns are hardly noticeable and the scales only cover about half of their bodies. :)

on monday morning, around 8:30, i saw the Auditeers walk up to the front door. and the idea to leave the front offices and walk all the way to the back of the building to drop something off was totally coincidental and in no way influenced by the Auditeers arrival. i swear. i had the thought a good five minutes before they were scheduled to arrive. :)

so i'm walking down the hallway when i'm accosted by this really annoying woman that thankfully doesn't work on the same floor as me. she whispers a question at me while sliding sideways glances to the front desk, where, of course, the Audit Team was checking in. She seemed frantic, and that in turn made me frantic. i swear, i was totally cool before that. not worried at all. okay, maybe a little worried, but i know we're going to suck - i've already had that realization, and so has a few other people - so now its just a matter of how bad we're going to be marked down because we suck, and how good our bullshitting skills are at how we're leaving Suckville and heading down the path to Better Town.

Annoying Lady jerked her head in the direction of my office, so we headed down the hallway so she could talk openly about the last minutes stuff she was trying to get done. turns out she needed an updated version of a report i'd sent her the week before. i told her no problem, i'd get right on it. she sprinted away, i took about a minute or so to get the report and email it to her. and i got the little email receipt showing she'd opened it a nanosecond after i'd sent it to her. and i thought to myself, 'let the games begin!'

been even more crazy around here since then. turns out the Auditeers are going to be in my department this friday, monday, and tuesday. yea! really yea, because once they're done asking me questions and digging through all our data i'll be able to breath a bit easier. and maybe actually work normal hours. *fingers crossed*

right now i should be reading over manuals. manuals that explain the different processes that we use. or should be using, actually. :) the guy that's helped us get our shit in order was prepping us on how to answer Auditeer questions. he asked us yesterday, 'when the auditor asks you what you do, what are you going to say?' and i said, with a big cheesy grin 'exactly what i'm supposed to do.' that got a chuckle, but it turns out i'm supposed to be a little more specific than that. but not by much.

for some reason i have this strong urge not to do any work right now. and that's bad. bad bad bad. *sigh* guess i'd better go be Data Cruncher Goddess for awhile.

hmm...i wonder if i can get that title printed on some business cards.

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

i read it in a magazine so it has to be right. right?

my breakfast this morning isn't exactly one for champions. hell, breakfast? more like brunch. it's just after 9 and i've been up for 4 hours now!

breakfast this morning consists coffee from the breakroom with a little bit of powdered creamer mixed in and couple of albino reese's peanut butter cups. yum. i'm not a big coffee fan - i don't need that first cup first thing in the morning to get me to a functional state - but i enjoy a cup every now and then. especially when i need a break. it's a handy excuse, especially when given to the coffee addicted.

me: i'll be right back. i have GOT to get me a cup of coffee... if you know what i mean. *wink wink*
java junky: ohyeahyeahiknowwhatyoumeangorightaheadcoffeegood.

i wish coffee perked me up like it does some people. i guess i'm just not drinking enough of it. hmmm... is that a new's year resolution i see?

the albino reese's peanut butter cups are actually white chocolate reese's. and boy are they yummy. i wasn't very impressed with the white chocolate kit kats, but the wc reese's are might fine specimens of choclate. though i'm not sure which i like best - regular chocolate or white chocolate reese's. i think i'll have to sample a bit more of both before the jury reaches a verdict. :)

and while it's not exactly the breakfast of champions (that is until goofing off at work turns into a competitive sport) it's not all that bad for me. see, i read in this muscle magazine that coffee actually burns fat (as long as you don't put sugar in it - creamer is fine). so the fat from the chocolate is being burned by the coffee i'm drinking!

better go grab another cup to burn off that snickers bar i had the other day. the guys at work are sucking down more and more cancer sticks (cigarrettes) as the pressure to fix practices and procedures and etc before the audit mounts. me? i think i'm becoming addicted to chocolate. and to Trips To The AM/PM mini mart. it's hell on a poor girl's wallet. not to mention hell on a not-so-thin girl's ass. :)

I'z Got Mad Skillz

Well, not really. But my favorite key on the keyboard today is the Z key.

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

And while I wasn't admiring the Z, I held the button for a little over three minutes. Go me!

How long can you hold it?

Do I not want to do work or what?!

I blame it all on the NaNoWriMo Procrastination Forum. Yeah. It's all those peoplez faultz for making me go to the game sitez.

*sits at desk trying to look innocent... and busy*

I have a feeling today is going to be a very slow day. Bummer that. :)

Monday, October 04, 2004

He promised me the moon and the stars. All I got was the moon.

Well, I've almost finished crossing of items from Saturday's To Do List. :) Any thing left will just have to hold it's horses until tomorrow - or next weekend - depending on how antsy the 'horses' get in the next few days.

Did do any cleaning on Sunday. Yay! The HB didn't even bring it up. I think he conveniently forgot he'd mentioned it. Fine by me! I mean, there are no flies flying around piles of garbage stuffed into corners and crevices. The weird looking mold is no longer hanging out in the bathtub because the HB already tackled that one a few days ago. And there's no awful smell to worry about (my sinuses are stuffed up, but I'm pretty sure there's no smell... i mean, the neighbor's aren't complaining yet). And... Hell, I'm such the 'guy' in this relationship when it comes to cleaning. With the HB being such a 'girl'. Heh heh. Aren't the guys supposed to be the slobs and the gals supposed to be the ones nagging about the mess?

We did do a bit of cleaning on Sunday though. Just not in the apartment. We took our cars to a little self-serve car wash last night. And the HB, being the wonderful boyfriend that he is, offered to scrub my extra dirty car for me. *sigh* Isn't he dreamy?

And he did it all while wearing a pair of shorts that no longer fit him. He's lost weight, and the shorts haven't, so while he was busy scrubbing away his shorts started sliding down. And since he was going commando I got mooned a few times. :) After about the third moon (hey, I was enjoying the view) I said, "Um, Hun, you might want to be careful. You just mooned the minivan that drove by." And the HB just wiggled his butt and kept on scrubbing. A wonderful topper to the weekend if I do say so myself. :)

Saturday, October 02, 2004

What I Did Last Weekend Report

Okay, so here's how I spent my time last weekend. Friday after work the HB and I went shopping because:

going to new place to hear rock bands = good excuse to buy new outfit

Among all the 'stuff I can't afford to buy but bought anyway because I really need the new clothes' I bought a new pair of jeans and this black top with these thin little straps that I don't think I'll ever wear out in the middle of the day because I wouldn't want to subject the people around me to the sight of my bare arms. Eek! But it worked for the concert, which was at night in a little club where the only lights were at the bar and on the stage. Especially with the Super Bra I bought. Yowza!

So anyways, Saturday got off to a nice, lazy start with me and the HB sleeping in. Then I got bit by the Nice Girlfriend bug and offered to cook him breakfast while he slept in a little more. I thought I'd be super nice in case this band I was dragging him to go see really sucked. :)

We left for West Hollywood a little after noon and checked into the hotel about an hour later. I expected the hotel to be a lot nicer, especially for how much it cost to stay there for a night. But I guess I was paying for the name and the location (Sunset Blvd) more than what it looked like inside. It was okay, but not spiffy like I expected.

For lunch, the HB and I went for a walk down Sunset Blvd until we found something that sounded good. That something ended up being a little Mexican food place. We ate outside and as long as the breeze was blowing it was really nice out. We were about ready to go when our first celebrity sighting happened.

This guy sat down at the table across from us and the HB whispers to me, "Doesn't he look familiar?"

I looked at the guy from the back and suggested, "That guy in that trailer for that movie we saw the other day?" The HB shakes his head and looks thoughtful. I look at the guy again from the side and think, "Oh, he looks like..." I thought about it for a second, then the HB and I looked at each other and whispered, "S.W.A.T.!"

Right across from us was the bad guy from the movie S.W.A.T.!

I wasn't quite sure at first. I mean, it looked just like him, but maybe I just wanted it to look like him, you know? Because 'oh my god a movie star is sitting two feet away from me!' But then someone came up and started talking to him about his Aston Martin and it was so totally his voice. The HB and I walked back to the hotel with big grins on our faces. We saw a famous person! Woohoo!

Later that night we showed up at the Whiskey in the middle of one band's set. They were very young and kind of fun to watch because the HB and I kind of ragged on them a bit during their set. The lead singer spent half his time with his back to the crowd (I think he thought he had a great ass and was trying to wow the crowd with his band's best asset) while spinning his microphone around by the wire (he reminded me of a rhythmic gymnast who's always throwing and twirling her ribbon in the air) and the other half was spent lip syncing the words that the guitar player was singing in a very over the top cheesy way. Like he was feeling the words of the song so much that he couldn't help but mouth the words. Very comical.

The second band played better than the first, but were less entertaining to watch. The lead singer was into the hoarse voice/yelling kind of rock singing, but showed absolutely no emotion at all while he did it. No facial expressions. No physical exertion while singing about how evil the world is or whatever young heavy metal/alt rockers sing about. The most amusing thing about this band was that one of the guitar players had a metal chain link around his neck, connected to the guitar, instead of a normal strap. He was hardcore man!

Then finally
Shim Sham
came out and played. And they rocked. They had great songs and really knew how to perform. The HB liked them so much we listened to their CD on the way home.

We checked out of the hotel on Sunday and while we were waiting for the valet to fetch our car we saw our second celebrity. Walking right in front of us, with a bathrobe on over his clothes and a big ass fucking clock around his neck like a necklace was none other than Flavor Flav! Yeeeea Boyeeeee! The HB totally turned into a little kid when he recognized him. And if I'd had a pen on me he would have run up to Flava Flav and gotten his autograph. It was really cool to see someone up close and personal right after you'd seen him on the television the day before. Very cool.

The rest of Sunday was spent back in our neighborhood looking for a new couch. And after all that searching we ended up buying a new dresser instead. :) Do we know how to shop or what? We bought the dresser from a wood crafty furniture store and the one we wanted had to be ordered. So we don't have it yet. Which sucks, because I want to have it in my apartment and start utilizing it so I can justify it's worth to myself once and for all because I had to put it on my already crowded credit card and... *sigh*

So that was my weekend. This weekend is turning out to be a lot less eventful. Though the HB was talking some crazy talk earlier about waking up early and cleaning the apartment. Poor guy, I think having to work on a Saturday fried a few of his brain cells. I mean, I know he's anal sometimes about having things clean around the apartment, but waking up early to do it? Double eek! I'm sure I'll be able to talk him out of it tomorrow though. :)

Today's To Do List

  1. listen to old forgotten CD's
  2. walk around in underwear and pretend no one can actually see me through the opened blinds and windows.
  3. look at laundry and think about how nice it would be to get it done today instead of waiting until the last minute tomorrow, where it will inevitably be hotter outside, and more crowded down at the little laundry room.
  4. ignore all previous thoughts of laborious work.
  5. take Super Duper Strength medicine to rid self of the Snot That Would Not Go Away
  6. sign up for NaNoWriMo
  7. try and figure out what the hell I could possibly write 50,000 words about
  8. work on the poor neglected blog a bit
  9. watch tivo-ed Farscape marathon to make room for next week's Farscape marathon
  10. go shopping for new couch to replace current couch with broken spring that creates massive black hole that sucks tv remotes and change and socks and small animals into the fourth level of hell (aka the dark and scary 'un-vacuumed for several years' space underneath the couch)
  11. go apartment hunting for cheaper apartment so we can afford the expensive couch the HB will probably talk me into
  12. add to list

I really wish I could think of something clever to type right here, but alas...

I meant to post yesterday - I was in a perfect work-slackin' mood and everything ("I don't see you To Do List! Fuck you work e-mails!") - but just as I was about to start writing I got handed a bunch of work. Work that the Boss wanted feedback from in a couple hours so he kept popping in and out of the office. Ain't that a timing bitch.

So I'm playing blog post catch up on this beautiful Saturday. I've got all the windows open and there's a nice cool breeze dancing through the apartment. *sigh*

I'm ignoring the laundry (is there a girl scout badge for this? i'm getting really good at it), ignoring the messing living room, ignoring all work whatsoever, and its frelling loverly! The only thing that would make this day better would be a laptop I could type on outside in the sun. Maybe I'll grab a pad of paper and pencil and go write out at the pool later. Yeah, that sounds like a good plan.

Another thing that would make this day better would be if the HB didn't have to work. It's his third week at the new job and they're already giving him his own shift to run, all by his bad-ass self. I take this to be a big thing because the last supervisor they trained didn't get his own shift to run until after two months. :) So it's nice that they have this much trust in his abilities, but it sucks because he'll be working Saturdays for a while.

But here I am, enjoying the weekend that I've been looking forward to since the previous weekend. Because the last weekend was a busy weekend and there wasn't a lot of time to recoup from work. Which is something I've needed for a couple weekends now. Work is still hectic and will be for a couple more weeks. We're still gearing up for the Big Bad Scary Audit that takes place not this coming Monday, but the Monday after that. And the Big Bad Scary Auditeers will be here for three weeks (eek!) so hopefully, at the most, I've only got four more weeks of craziness at work.

I say hopefully because I think there may be permanent damage of the brain. I'm not quite 'My side, your side! My side, your side!' crazy yet, but I'm getting close.

I even had a dream the other night about work. It wasn't anything interesting, like I'm at work and aliens come and shoot everybody who's wearing green and all of a sudden I find myself in combat gear along with Keanu Reeves, who's my new desk neighbor and a surprising wiz at excel documents, and we have to fight the aliens to save my job, but we're no longer at my place of work, we're in the middle of a McDonald's playland, in a giant ball cage and...

Yeah. Nothing as interesting as that dream would be. I was at work, and nothing was distorted or weird, no dream side effects whatsoever, and I was doing something on the computer. Boring, simple stuff that's on my mental 'To Do' list. I was dreaming about something I had to work on the next day; I was playing it out in my mind while I slept. How messed up is that?

Anywhoo... I think its time for a snack break. Then I'll come back to the computer and type up my What I Did Last Weekend report, complete with celebrity sightings.

Friday, September 24, 2004

The Great Food Watch

Up until a few minutes ago I thought the rumor about lunch (that I mentioned in my last post) was going to be just that. A rumor.

It was around 10:30 this morning when I'd heard one of the supervisors might buy lunch for everybody. Me and Desk Neighbor P and The New Guy were about to go out to lunch, but decided to stick around and hold out for the free food. Because a free lunch is most often better than lunch you have to pay for.

So we stayed at work and waited. And waited and waited and waited.

The food just arrived... three freaking hours later!

I was ready to mutiny. Mutiny I tell ya! I was tempted to snack on something until lunch got here, but I had no money (I was only going out to lunch because someone had a buy one get one free coupon) and my emergency stash of stale tastes-like-the-inside-of-a-metal-desk crackers (i.e. old Saltines) has run out.

So I toughed it out. And was rewarded with Togo's sandwiches! Yummy. And since lunch was delivered so late there were a few sandwich halves left over so I went back for another one. Yummy!

And in all the excitement I just stabbed myself in the boob with a pen. I really have no idea how that happened. I was holding the pen backwards and then spazzed or something and stabbed myself in the boob. Now there's a half inch pen mark on my shirt, right on top of the boob for everyone to see.

*smacks hand to forehead*

Is it time to go home yet?

Time for a little Shim Sham Shimmy

It's Friday! And there is rejoicing in the land!

Last time I updated was last week, during my 'friday'. I was bogged down with work, sick with a cold, and looking forward to spending a three-day weekend with some girlfriends.

Now it's a week later and not much has changed. :)

I'm still bogged down with work, and now that my lovely assistant (i.e. the intern) has left and started school, I have no one to pass on all these little tasks to. Or the big-ugly-time-consuming tasks. So now it's all piling up in my In Box. Crap nuggets!

I'm still sick with a cold (or allergies as the doctor said last Friday). The cold stepped up a notch in severity, and in overall general crappiness that just makes you feel slow and tired and icky. Definitely not the way I wanted to feel going into the weekend. I got an infection in both my eyes and they became all sore and red. So red, I swear I looked like some extra in a mutant movie. It would have been cool if it hadn't meant my eyes were so sore and blurry. So I went to the doctor's office on Friday and got a prescription for eye medicine and nose spray. Yay! The eyes are all better now, but the snot is still hanging around. Damn persistent snot.

Oh and my sinuses are swollen like a beeyatch. So much so that it's noticeable. Freaking noticeable! My nose isn't the cutest nose in the world, but its pretty damn 'okay'. Except now the sinus cavities on each side of the nose are swelling. My nose is all deformed now!

Okay, so it's not that noticeable. I haven't reached Circus Freak Show status yet, but if this cold/allergy doesn't go away any time soon I just might. (I can feel the sinuses expanding right this very second. Blah!) The HB has noticed it. And kindly commented to me about it.

Me: Blah blah blah blah bl-
HB: Wow. Your sinuses are really swollen.
Me: Hell yeah they are. They hurt like a... Wait a sec... how did you know? *gasp* Is it that noticeable?!?!
HB: Yep.
Me: *calmly walks to mirror to investigate* Damn. And right before the Vogue magazine cover photo shoot!

If the HB notices it, I wonder how many other people will notice. Other people who don't know I'm sick and just think I have a really weird shaped nose.

Concerned Uninformed Stranger 1: Oh my! Look at the girl's nose! It's all disproportioned.
Concerned Uninformed Stranger 2: Poor thing. I hope the circus pays well.

Even with all the cold/allergy stuff going on I still had fun last weekend. The Evil Snot didn't keep me from shopping and gossiping and laughing and cheering on the Red Knight (Medieval Times is so much fun!) I don't know how much fun it was for my friends to have my snotty self tagging along but I think they had fun too. :)

And now another weekend is here and I'm soooooooooooo looking forward to it. What I really need is a weekend full of relaxation, naps, laundry fairies, big fancy breakfasts cooked by the HB, and more naps. But that's not going to happen.

The HB and I are going to a concert at the Whiskey A Go Go. The IT guy at my work is in a band called Shim Sham and they're playing with a bunch of other bands at the Whisky Saturday night. I thought I'd go check them out because 1) I really can't picture him singing and rocking out so even if they suck, and the other bands suck, I imagine t will good entertainment and 2) it's something to do, a reason to go out and about and get away from the apartment, which is almost always a good thing.

Tickets were cheap, but then the HB and I decided to get a hotel for Saturday night (I plan on staying up way past my bedtime and neither one of us will be in a state to drive home.) Somehow I let him talk me into making reservations at an expensive one. Eek! Sometimes I like pretending I have money and am not constantly thinking/worrying about bills and stuff, which is probably why there wasn't much talking-into going on. :) It'll be the fanciest hotel I've ever stayed at (i.e. most expensive), and I love staying in hotels (well, the nice and clean ones anyway), so I'm looking forward to that part of the weekend.

And the weekend's just a few hours away! Wheeeeeee!

But for right now I'm just looking forward to lunch. We're working with sort of a skeleton crew today and there's a rumor going around that someone is going to be buying the employees lunch. Weee! Hopefully lunch time is soon because I've been here a couple hours and am a starvin marvin. :)

Thursday, September 16, 2004

and in this corner, weighing in at 5.4 pounds iiiiiiiit's The Phlegm-inator!

This week has been hectic.

And tiresome.

And full of phlegm.

Tiresome, because I've been waking up at the ungodly hour of 4 o-freakin-clock in the morning, showing up to work at 5 AM and leaving work at 5 PM. Well, not exactly five. A few days I was able to leave at 4:30 PM. *rolls eyes* My new mantra: "Overtime pay Overtime pay Maxed out credit cards Overtime pay."

Catchy, eh?

And the weeks' been full of phlegm because some time last week I started getting sick. I believe the Evil Phlegm started its slow creep on Sunday. Or maybe it was Saturday. I can't quite remember. All I know is that it was right around the time I started conducting these training sessions at work. Because with the Evil Phlegm cold came it's delightful cousin, Mr. Scratchy Throat.

I've met Mr. Scratchy Throat before, but not like this. This time he's on a mission. A mission to make me loose my voice.

See, I think I pissed off Mr. Scratchy Throat last time he came to visit. Maybe I kicked him out too soon with a wave of cold medicine tablets before he could get his fill of applesauce (a sore throat magical salve) and Simon & Simon reruns. So this time around he planned and he plotted and he diabolically masterminded his way into my body right before I needed my voice the most: for my All Important Training Sessions.

It's been awful. My voice is at half volume at best. When I try and raise it, or I talk too much with out taking a pause or a water break (which seems to be at least every 42 seconds, according to my bladder) I go into a coughing fit. It's really hard to train someone when you're trying not to cough cold germs all over them.

My office mates have been sympathetic because they're sick too. (Everybody around here is sick!) The office mates are not as sick as I am though (figures, don't it?) so when they hear my voice they say, "Ahhhhhhhh. You sound awful!" Then they give me throat lozenges they have stashed away in their desks. I have never been a big fan of the Halls or the Ricola, but I was this week when it was either suck on those things or embarrass myself by peeing myself (I'm drinking lots of water) or rupturing a spleen or something.

At least I'm not as "sick as a dog." This cold could be a lot worse. Snot could be flowing out my nose like a water park amusement ride. Instead it's dripping down my throat, hence the visit of Mr. Scratchy Throat.

I would say my level of sickness could be better classified as being as "sick as a kitty cat with an uncoughable hairball." My throat gets a little scratchy tingle so I hack and cough and make strange noises until everyone turns and stares at me, waiting for something to come up. But it never does.

Which I say "hallelujah!" about because that means the phlegm isn't ready to come out yet. Which means I'm not sitting here in the office with that little rattling phlegmy noise every time I breathe. That's just embarrassing.

So anyways, its Thursday, which is my Friday (I have tomorrow off! Woo!) and I can't wait for the end of the work day to get here. Until then I've got work to catch up on and people to train. And sour candy Peach Rings to suck on (for purely medicine reasons - i.e. the scratchy throat).


An Update To Sunday's Posts

I started writing this post on Monday, but never had the time to finish it. And haven't had time until today. (Actually I still don't have time, but I'm doing it any way because I am all-powerful and can get away with it - i.e. I'm writing this when no one is on the office and have consigned my fate to work super fast later to catch up)

So anyway, in case anyone is wondering, that little problem I caused on Sunday, that I was kinda totally freaking out over? It's been fixed. I came in to work Monday, dreading whatever disaster situation I was soon to face. After I got home on Sunday I realized I should have paged the tech guy with a 911 message. Or kept calling his cell phone until he answered. At the time, I didn't want to ruin his Sunday, and figured it wouldn't be that big a deal. My brain was too clouded with self-embarrassment and frustration for messing up the system. And then I got home and all kinds of different scenarios started playing in my head and I realized, 'oops, this could be a bigger problem then I thought.'

So I came into work Monday and found the problem solved for me. The tech guy had gotten my message after I'd left work and fixed it all. It was an easy fix and was no problem at all. It was only a fix that he could do, but still an easy fix. So I'd fretted over nothing really.

But it was good I fretted, I guess. Because while I fretted, the HB made me realize that next time I should keep calling until my problem gets solved and screw everybody else and they're day off!

So 'yeah me!' for learning something new. :)

Sunday, September 12, 2004

"I am learning all the time. The tombstone will be my diploma." -Eartha Kitt

I hate being stupid. I hate it I hate it I hate it.

I'm not completely stupid. I'll give myself that much credit. I'm not book stupid. I can read and learn and study. I can take and pass tests. But that's just a very small crumb of the human existence pie. Being book smart will only get you so far. What's more important is being "street" smart. Common sense smart. People smart. Life smart. Whatever-the-right-word-is smart. At least that's the way I feel lately, long before today ever happened.

I haven't got much of these smarts. Or, probably more accurately, I don't have as much as I feel I should have. (Maybe that's part of the problem). And it's distressing. It's like having an irrational fear of ladybugs. You know the ladybug won't do any more damage to you than drop a little poop on your finger, yet still you shriek and duck for cover anytime one flitters by. Irrational!

I know there's nothing wrong with being stupid, at first. Everyone is stupid until they learn. That's just how the process works. I know this, and yet sometimes I'll avoid a potential Show Everyone How Stupid I Am situation. Not all the time (I have plenty of non-stupid moments!), but sometimes. Sometimes I just can't help myself. And I don't know why. I just sort of freeze up. Hide. Evade. Avoid. Shy away. Just to keep from looking stupid.

How stupid is that?

I know that a great way to not be stupid is to ask questions. To confront the situation my instincts might tell me to avoid. To make mistakes and learn from them. I know there's a need to be stupid once, to avoid being stupid on future occasions. I know this, yet sometimes that's just not enough. Not all the time, mind you. But sometimes.

It's something I dislike about myself. But I can recognize this about myself, which is a start in the right direction I guess. I know I want to change, and knowing this is half the battle, right? Where's G.I. Joe when you need him.

So I'm working on it, and have been for while. I like to think that I'm getting better at it. (Then again, sometimes I like to think that I'm as skinny as a Super Slurpee straw with Wonder Woman superhero abilities, so I might not always be the best judge of self. *ahem*)

But seriously, I am getting better at it. I give myself permission to be stupid every once in awhile. Well, okay, its more frequent than 'every once in awhile,' but you get the point.

*checks Today's To Do List... finds Give Self Permission To Be Stupid... marks down a big fat checkmark next it*

And then I learn from the 'being stupid'. Hopefully. Most of the time. That's the plan at least. :) Because "life is about constantly learning, and once it isn't, you might as well be dead." One of my favorite high school teachers, Mr. Hevener, told our history class this once. I liked it, believed in it, and therefore wrote it down to keep with me always. As a sort of reminder, I guess, that 'oh yeah, that's what I'm supposed to be doing. Learning."

Well, that's all I have to say about that. I'm so done learning for the day. Is this crappy Sunday over yet???

Hello. My name is Loon. And I'm a moron.

I'm a well balanced person. I eat vegetables for the body. And for balance I eat chocolate for the soul. I say mean things about stupid drivers on the freeway. And for balance I graciously let people cut in front of me who've been waiting a millennia to turn on to the crowded street. Sometimes I have flashes of pure brilliance. And for balance I sometimes have moments of pure boneheadedness.

Today I had a colossal moment of utter boneheadedness that will surely be marked down in the Annuls of Loon.

I'm at work today. On a Sunday. And boy does that suck. But it was my choice so I guess I can't bitch too much. I have to train a bunch people and thought 'hey, I'll come in on Sunday and train the couple of guys that work on Sunday and knock them off my list right away and I'll show the bosses that I'm super committed to doing a super job!' Plus there was the whole 'overtime pay' motivating factor.

So here I am, training people. And it's gone well.

Until now.

See, while I had a break between sessions I thought I'd be clever and do my administrator job stuff and change a couple of settings that needed changing. I haven't had time during the normal work week, but hey, its Sunday! And now I have time.

So I'm changing things and its all good in the data 'hood. Then I think to myself, 'you know self, I'd really like to change the setting for this field, see if I can make it more user friendly.' So I tried one or two things, nothing happened, so decided to leave it to the Head Data Guru Guy who's helping us prepare for the Big Scary Audit and went on my merry way. I didn't think anything I tried was that major, that it would have any effect what so ever on the system, because nothing changed. I clicked on properties, clicked on one fucking button, and when I pulled up the properties window again the button was no longer clicked. So I thought it didn't take. Something took though all right. Took my sanity along with it too.

I frelled up one of the work modules in the system. A major one. The one that I'm doing the training in. Go me!


I have no idea what I did wrong, and I can't fix it. I open up the work module and I get a mean little error message. It looks like a bunch of gobblygook: 'Error to file 2000345EE38375'.

Translation: You are a MORON! Step away from the system NOW!


I've totally screwed up my Desk Neighbor's day. He works Sundays thru Thursdays, so today's his 'Monday'. And he can't access the module he needs to do most of his work on.

*bangs head on top of desk*

So I guess that means no more training today.


I seriously want to cry. I won't, because it's really not that big deal in the whole scheme of things, so why bother really. I'll just pout instead.


I put in a call to the Head Data Guru Guy. Left a message on his voice mail. Hopefully he checks his messages before I leave today so he can help me fix it before all my training sessions tomorrow. All five of them!!!

Gah! I'm so embarrassed. I'm supposed to be the Local Guru Administrator and I'm such a bonehead.

Okay, it's 10:30 am. I'm going to carry on my little pity party somewhere else. Like at the AM/PM mini market down the street where I'll buy a 64 oz soda to drown my sorrows in.

I say ... and you think ... ?

  1. Self-esteem:: right now its pretty damn low. Details (i.e. 'I'm So Stupid' rant) to come later
  2. Migraine:: what I'm on the verge of getting. Waaaaaah!
  3. Phoebe:: Cates
  4. Nervous:: Nelly
  5. Punctual:: something I wasn't this morning. (I'm at work right now. @#$%&)
  6. Liver damage:: too much booze
  7. Legal disclaimer:: Warning: Contents in Coffee Cup are HOT Dip Shit
  8. Reverend:: pastor
  9. Supple:: boobies
  10. Binder:: school

Friday, September 10, 2004

Yeah, Moe, that team sure did suck last night. I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked. *

Hello to all you first time readers, strolling in from a search engine or a link or whatnot.

And a super special hello to all you frequent visitors (from the quasi frequents to the borderline stalker frequents) who keep checking back in to this dinky little blog to see if I've posted anything new.

Which I haven't in a while. My bad. Hmmm... wonder how long its been....

*looks at date of last post*


Has it really been that long??? Time sure flies by fast when your workload about doubles and your brain turns to mush. I remember the good old days when I could read blogs and write in blogs and visit fun links and play games on the internet and etc, etc, etc. All while at work!

Now my company and bosses are freaking out because of this big bad Audit Team that's coming to town. Ooh! Beware!

Translation: a lot of busy work for me. See, I work for a company that's owned by a Monster Company that has its fingers in a million different pies. And the Monster Company likes to make sure its little companies are performing at least up to par. So its been passed down the line how important this Audit is. Normally two to three people show up to Audit one of the Monster's businesses. This time? For lil' ol' us? They're sending "three to four" Audit-eers! Ooh, scary. I swear, when my boss (a new one - just in time for the Audit - oy vey!) said this in our new weekly How Much More Crap Do We Have To Clean Up Before The Audit meetings, he looked scared. Maybe it was just for our benefit. So we feel motivated to work harder. But this boss has been through one of these Audits before at a sister facility. So he should know first hand how serious this all is... eek!

So everyone's scrambling, making sure we're doing stuff right, and that we're prepared to answer any question the Audit-eers might throw at us. Fun times all around. Bleah. At least I'm able to work some overtime because overtime pay rocks the cat socks!

I know I've complained about the work situation before, but its such a big issue in my life right now. I'll be at home, trying to relax and forget that I even work during the day, and a problem will pop into my head. "Oh, I've got to remember to call So And So about Such And Such." Then I realize I'm thinking about work and smack myself in the forehead. The smacking is only a temporary fix to the over worked brain problem. Heh.

When I have had time to write or blog or whatever, the only thing in me to write about was how sucky my job is at the moment. And that just sucks. And yeah, that's what the above couple of paragraphs were about, but now I've got more than just sucky suckness to write about. I've got a happy news. Yeah!

Hopefully I can get back in the swing of things soon. Because I miss writing in my little blog. And it is sort of cathartic in a way to write it all the suckiness down. So I should spend time writing - an Exercise in Exorcising the Work Demons. Because it's for my own good dammit!


So okay, the good points before I get back to work. I wish I had more time to write about them. Maybe I'll get to them later. Maybe I'll have time on Sunday, since I sort of volunteered myself to work on Sunday to train a bunch of people and *grumble grumble bitch bitch bitch* Yeah. So anyways... :) The good stuff:

* The HB found a job! A much, much better paying job! Woo!

* I'll be writing a check next week to pay off the balance of my car loan. And it's only half of my normal monthly car payment. So after next week NO MORE CAR PAYMENTS! Woo!

These first two Happy Points make my nearly empty bank account glow with the warm fuzzies.

* Girlfriend Weekend is coming up. Not this weekend but the following weekend. Zoink is coming down to visit, and the two of us will be storming Princess AJ's castle. I am so so so so so looking forward to this. I'm only taking the Friday off for vacation (along with the weekend of course) but it will be a much needed work breather. Girlfriend Weekend! Woo!

Damn. I thought I had another Happy Point to share. Oh well, I'm sure I'll think of it later. Later when I've done some work and cleared up some space in my brain. Sorry Happy Point, read the sign. No Vacancy.


Okay. Back to work. I'm setting a bad example for the intern. Unless of course I've bogged her down with so much work she can't concentrate on anything else. If that's the case then, well... oops. It'd be bad to break the intern. She's still here for another week!

*title quote provided by Homer Simpson

Monday, August 16, 2004

Birthday Month Meme

Because my lunch break is over and I don't want to go back to work just yet, and because I want to be like Jodi when I grow up, I present to you the [ insert trumpet fanfare here] Birthday Month Meme.

MAY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts (I have no idea, which probably means my other ideas aren't all that sharp). Easily angered (though if I keep working at my present job I'm going to learn to be easily angered - bunch of morons!). Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.

Friday, August 13, 2004

That? That's my brain leaking all over the floor from Information Overload. Cool, eh?

well, i survived the week. go me! next week will be the real bitch of a week though. we've got people coming in to help set up this Process Thing, and a big meeting on monday to go over a Key Process Thingy, yet two main people in the middle of this process are not going to be here. so they won't have any input, they won't know what's going on, and... and...

*slams forehead on desk*

its been a really long, crazy day. but at least it went by really fast, mainly because i was running around busy busy busy all day. next thing i know... WHAMMO! it's two o'clock. and i'm thinking to myself, awesome. then thirty minutes later (i swear it felt as if at least a half hour had past) i look at the clock and... WHAMMO! its 2:05. and i'm thinking to myself, $&#*$%^$@#.

and... uh... yeah. now its 2:54 ... and 30 seconds... 23 seconds... and its time to go home!!!!!!! weeeeeeeee!!!!!!! (at least it will be by the time i clock out. hehehe.)

Monday, August 09, 2004

Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.

Mr. Desk Neighbor is on vacation for two weeks. Two frelling weeks! That means no corny one-liners and all around general silliness to make me laugh and make the work hours fly swiftly by. For two whole weeks! That's ten days. That's 80+ hours of empty Desk Neighbor-ness.


That also means I'll be taking over his job duties. For two frelling weeks!

Eek !

But wait, the good news doesn't stop there folks! I just learned this morning that Mr. My Body's So Old It's Falling Apart On Me (aka the guy that was out for over a month a few months ago) is going to be on vacation soon. Can you guess when? That's right folks, its NEXT WEEK!

Which means lil' ol' me will be doing THREE PEOPLES JOBS for a whole bloody week. I swear I'm going to go bonkers next week. And it won't be a pretty sight. The madness has already started; I've got mini post-it notes everywhere with things I have to remember to do scribbled messily on them. There's so many post-it notes my desk is starting to look like some sort of furry yellow monster. Little multiplying bastards.

Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit amphetamines.

Wednesday, August 04, 2004

Morbid Musings

The other night the HB and I went out on a carne asada run. Earlier in the day we'd spent a few hours out at the pool (I'm still whining about the sunburn - ouchie ouch) and then we napped a bit (i.e. fell asleep really early from sun exhaustion and dozed a few hours until waking wide at 11 p freaking m). Upon awakening, the HB discovered that he was craving carne asada. Particularly carne asada tacos. Upon hearing this I thought I'd crave some meat too (heh). Only I wanted a carne asada burrito. No beans please.

Since we were so in sync in our late night hunger cravings we hit the road in search of food. And who was driving? Me. The one who kept yawning. The one who hadn't yet fully recovered from her early evening nap. I can't nap successfully. Most times naps make me groggy afterwards. But not the HB. They almost always revive him. Lucky bastard.

So while I was groggy at the wheel he was wide awake in the passenger seat, ready to do his 'backseat driving'. Why didn't we switch positions? Well, that would have made too much sense now, wouldn't it? And besides, I was fine after the first twenty minutes. :)

Yes. Twenty minutes. This was no quick jaunt for food. We had to go into a whole other city! Granted, where we live there are a ton of cities crammed right up next to each other, so driving twenty minutes and leaving one city, driving through another, and ending up in a third isn't as weird as it may sound. At least as weird as it would have sounded to pre-Sardine City Living Me.

We drove south towards the HB's old job because he wanted to try the food from these street vendor carts he's always driving past. When we got to the right neighborhood I saw all kinds of vendors set up, one on almost every block, some directly across the street from another, all with their grills cooking at full steam. And the lines for each one were way too long - 'standing in line for at least twenty minutes' long. Judging by the size of the lines we figured the food must be pretty good, but we were hungry, so we went to a little nearby restaurant that the HB knew for a fact was good. The wait there wasn't nearly as long. We got our food (which, for the record, was very yummy and worth the long drive) and headed home.

On the way home, while driving down a street I've driven down numerous times before, the HB pointed out an old folks retirement home. "Now those are nice apartments. I bet the rent is cheap too. Too bad we're not old." A few seconds later, at the end of the block on the opposite side of the street we passed a cemetery.

A cemetery. Less than a block away from a retirement home.


Is this common? Is this seen as a convenience for some people? A selling point when looking for a retirement home?

Grandma: This apartment complex has got a pool and a wide screen tv in the club house!
Grandpa: But this one is next door to a cemetery. Think of the money we'll save in hearse fees?

Me? I don't think I'd want to live so close to the place where my dead body will be rotting underground for the next however many years. Or even close to something that resembles the place of dead carcass residences. I'd rather be cremated anyway, but still. I'll grow old somewhere else thank you very much!

What a morbid reminder. Hey there Oldy Oldster! Death is just around the corner!


I've given this a lot of thought (not really) and I've decided that when I'm retired and flabby and one bus stop away from Senile Town, if I'm not living in a phat condo by the beach, I want to live by a strip club. (As long as its run by someone with enough sense to set up shop far away from a cemetery.)

I want to live by a strip club because the neighborhood would be filled with interesting characters. Wouldn't it? Young and lively characters. Horny characters. That equals good rowdy fun, right? Just what I need in the last few crabby years of my life.

Because while I'll be fun and energetic and full of life when I'm only 10% wrinkle free, I'll still be crabby. It's genetically unavoidable. And living near a strip club will give me plenty of ammo to crab on about.

Because I will be a big time crabber. A big time Griper of All Things.

I've promised the HB that I won't be too too bad a griper. At least not as bad as my grandma currently is. In the last couple of years she's worked her self up to the Big Leagues of Bitching. She bitches about everything and everybody to anyone that will listen. Especially those who will agree with her (which she feels are, by default, her relatives. And those who associate with her relatives - i.e. the HB.) So after being within earshot of an interesting gripe fest, I promised the HB that I wouldn't be as bad as that. "Honestly sweetie, it gets watered down through the generations."

My mom and her sister have vowed to each other to never be as crabby as their mother has become. They've promised to be each other's watch dog and alarm system, to keep each other in line and remind them when they're driving their loved ones crazy.

I can see it now... two little old ladies on the of them complaining about something mundane... when the other one snaps...

Sister 1: ah quit yer bitchin. you're starting to sound like Mom.
Sister 2: *gasp* am not!
Sister 1: am too!
Sister 2: bitch!

I don't have a lovely sister like that, so I'm going to have to rely on friends. It's either that or make sure the HB doesn't start up a gun collection in his old age. :)

Friday, July 30, 2004

One more thing...

I really should get back to work. We've got ourselves a temp/intern and she's run out of things to do. And I've run out of things to have her do. Eek! I wonder what's more boring, the boring repetitive eye-gouging-inducing, data perusing and collecting I'm having her do, or the sitting and staring in between the tasks I give her. I've told her she can play games or surf the web while she waits. Its really no big deal since she really has nothing she should be doing instead. But she's not doing it! What's wrong with her? I know she's not against such things. She's played solitaire earlier this week!

Oh well. Must find something for her to do while I'm busing playing solitaire and surfing the web. I'm not really. Don't have the time. Just have barely enough time to type up meaningless blog posts. Yay!

So here goes...

While I should be saving my money in this dire financial time of mine I went out and bought a new cell phone. But I had to. Really I did. The HB needs one while he job hunts, so he can take calls and setting up interviews while running around everywhere handing out resumes and flashing his killer smile at all the receptionist ladies so they put his resume at the top of the stack. I've never been with him on a resume-handing-out run, so I'm not sure about the whole killer smile flashing, but when I picture it I picture the flashing. (And now I'm picturing a different kind of flashing. 'Here's my resume!')


The HB had a cell phone, but canceled the service when the company he no longer works for (see previous post if you're joining the party late) gave him a company phone. (A phone that was so cheap and old the battery wouldn't stay charged for the entire work day, which was way inconvenient.) Needless to say they didn't let him keep the phone when they let him go, so he is now cell phone-less. For the HB this is a major EEK!

To make a long blog post short, I wanted a new cell phone deal, a sort of pay-as-you-go deal, but I still had three months left on my old contract. And to get with the new plan I had to get a new cell phone. So I gave the HB my old phone to use for the next three months (hopefully he won't need it for that long *crosses fingers, toes, etc*) while I start using a new cell phone and plan deal thingy. So it all makes sense. Very logical. Practical. Full of makes-sense-ical.

And it's a great excuse to buy a new phone. It hurt, really hurt, to shell out money for a new phone. Money that could have gone to chipping away at the credit card debt, i.e. the Black Money Hole of Doom. So while I was feeling the pain, I reminded myself that in the long run I'll be saving money. It'll pay for itself in no time. Plus, now I have a KICK ASS PHONE!!! Seriously. It is sweeeeeeeeet. And small and a hundred times lighter than my old clunker. I'm in love with my new phone. Its not a camera phone, which I would have LOVED to have bought. But I nearly passed on the $70 dollar phone. There was no way I could have talked myself into the $250+ phone.

Not that there was much talking into needed. The HB looked at me and said something like, "Come on. You know you want to buy it." That's about all the convincing I needed. I'm so easy sometimes. Especially when its about a cool new phone!

Because my last cell phone had lost its flavor. The umpff that made me spend so much money on it when it was the 'new thing'. But I wasn't feeling it anymore. I mean I was, because it was really heavy compared to some cell phones out there, but I wasn't feeling it. It no longer complimented my aura. So it was time for a change. Because when its time to change you've got to rearrange. Isn't that something The Brady's sang about? Anyways, bottom line is I'm in love with an inanimate object. One that vibrates when someone wants to talk to me. And plays a Cool ring tone. And has games in images and stuff in color. Color! For the love of all things digital and shiny my cell phone has color! And I can access the internet and check my email and do all kinds of super spiffy stuff. And it's a flip phone. A real flip phone! I've wanted one of those ever since I saw Mulder and Scully had flip phones. Sure, my flippy phone looks nothing like their flippy phones looked like, but it doesn't matter. It still makes Pretend to Be Scully Play Time easier. And more fun.

And this short post is no longer short. It's the cell phones fault. It's just soooooooooooooo cool. And... no. I must stop here. And find work for the temp my assistant. (Sounds spiffy, eh?) I don't even have time to spell check this. Oh well... :)

Oh poo! There go my plans for that summer place in the Hamptons!

Do I sound all snobby saying 'oh poo'? I was going to type 'well shit!' but thought I'd step it up a notch in the class department for this post. Well, at least for the title of the post...

There's a bunch of drama going on in my life at the moment.

Drama = Crack
My Life = Skanky Crack Whore

My life just can't get enough of the stuff!

Well, actually, it's really not all that bad. Seriously. No need to worry. I might have exaggerated just a wee bit with the 'skanky' reference. (Sorry to all you crack whores out there. Didn't mean to stereotype.)

Because you see, my boyfriend got laid off from his job on Monday. Which sucks mucho much. Especially because there was nothing he could have done differently to avoid it. Other than not accept their job offer in the first place. But he didn't really realize what a crappy place it was until after he'd been working there for a few months.

The HB was a supervisor at some little warehouse place. He ran most of the departments there, and was getting paid the most (except for the manager of the whole building), and he was way overdue for a raise. So when the owners decided to do MAJOR cutbacks, because they're in serious need of cash RIGHT NOW, they got rid of the second biggest salary. Which in a messed up sort of way kind of makes sense. Doesn't make the owner any lower on the Prick Bastard scale.

The HB was pissed that they let him go while keeping the incompetent supervisor whose departments the HB kept taking under his wing so they started working right. Because sure, she was cheaper for them to keep, but she didn't know what she was doing. Surely the bosses could see that! The HB was also pissed because he was let go not more than a week after the owner's visit to the warehouse, where he talked about his plans for the company, and how he really hoped they included the HB. 'I really see you advancing more and becoming a huge asset blah blah blah.' Not more than a week later they start firing a lot of people. A lot of peons. And then the HB. Instead of looking ahead and investing for the future they cut back to get money in their pockets. Prick Bastards!

But it's all good. It truly is. Because now the HB is going to find a better job that pays him what he's worth and (hopefully) isn't populated with the same type of people he's worked with at the last (two) jobs he's had.

Yesterday the HB went back to the warehouse to return a few items (one being a company credit card I'm sure he was really tempted to use). While he was there he talked to the manager, and the manager gave him a bunch of phone numbers. Phone numbers of companies desperately looking for new supervisors to come run their warehouses. And he promised to tell these companies, if they called for a reference, that the HB practically ran the whole place. Nice former boss!

Also, while the HB was there, his former manager boss told him that the company was firing the rest of the management team (one of which was Incompetent Supervisor Lady). So the manager boss guy is the only management figure left. And he's freaking out because he won't be able to handle the workload. The company is walking a fine line with their customers, and if they fuck up anything the customers will bolt in a nanosecond, so there's no time to look for and hire really cheap labor to try and run things and keep things going as smooth as they were. It sounds like it would just be easier for the owner guy to shoot that warehouse in the head like the sick horse that it is and put it out of its misery.

So while it sucks that the HB has to look for another job, we're looking on the bright side of things. Because the bright side of things are yellow and shiny and happy. The HB wasn't happy where he was working. He'd been thinking a lot lately about finding a new job, but had wanted to stick it out there for a least a two years. This is just the little shove he needed to go out there and look.

I'm a little worried that money will get even tighter than it has been around here for awhile. There's not much room for constriction around here. I'll be paying rent and the bills for at least a month or two, but I know I'll be able to handle it. As well as handle all the debt and money the HB owes that by some freakish act of karma or murphy's fucking law or what-have-you that has suddenly piled up a month before the loss of his job.


But yeah, everything will work out fine. And with out really trying hard the HB has already gone on a job interview. He put out the feelers the day after he was let go, let some contacts he had through work know he was looking, and after only a couple of days he's got some leads. And they're all saying that this is the time to be looking for a job, at least in his field. Hopefully they're not yanking his chain too hard. We'll find out soon enough in a few weeks just how open the job field.

*crosses finger, toes, eyes, butt cheeks, nose hairs, boobs, ...*

Getting my Vitamin C Groove on

I am currently drinking chunky orange juice. It's kind of... uh... interesting. The chunks are frozen bits of orange juice, because the little carton of oj is in the process of thawing/defrosting/becoming not frozen. So the chunks are nothing gross like bugs or super radioactive mold spores or anything. But still... orange juice isn't supposed to have anything more solid than pulp in it. So encountering the ice chunks is a little weird. But hey, its all about the 160% vitamin C intake BAY-BEE! woo!

Friday, July 23, 2004

what can i say, it's just a banana dancing kind of day

Sheesh. I haven't been writing again. Shame on me. I have only myself to blame, and that's, well, that's pretty sad. I have been doodling and jotting down random thoughts in my binder. But that doesn't really count. I also haven't been paying attention to the blog much either. Sorry about that Bloggy.

*gives the blog a hug*

It's just I have nothing interesting to write about. And when I do, I don't have the time. And when I have the time I'm doing something else because I feel road blocked. Like I'm suffering from Creative Constipation or something. It's there, I can feel it, but it just won't come out of me.


But I don't mind too much at the moment. Because I'm in such a happy mood.

Work was hectic yesterday. And in the middle of it all, the HB calls me just to say hello. Just because he hasn't done it in awhile. :) When he got home after work we went out to dinner. And laughed a lot and ate way too much.

We both ordered steaks, different steaks, but both medium well. Mine turned out to be a little on the red side while his turned out to be a little on the well well done side. I made some comment like "wow. This is really pink." But I didn't mind it at all. The HB, being ever so gentlemanly, offered to trade me steaks. Maybe he didn't want the well done steak. Or maybe he was just being nice. I think maybe it was a little bit of both.

I said, "what? You don't want yours?" He pretended to get all huffy and puffy and offended. "I was trying to be chivalrous and offer you my steak since yours is so pink." The HB then digs into his steak. I lowered my fork and knife to the table and said in a very soft and sincere voice, "That was very kind of you to offer to trade your dinner with me. I really appreciate it. Thank you for being so thoughtful." Then I raised my fork and knife and added, "Now shut the fuck up and let me eat." The HB laughed and said, "That's why I love you."

And I forgot all about my hectic day.  :)

And today, well, its Friday. So that adds an automatic point to the Happy Tally. And this morning, as I was leaving for work, it was sort of semi foggy out. Seeing that filled me with a wallop of warm fuzzies. Because it was something different for my senses to take in I guess.

Most mornings it's the same old thing. When I wake up, at 5 in the morning, there's not enough light outside to illuminate my apartment. So I fumble around in the dark to turn on a lamp. And I have to fumble all the way (all two feet in my tiny ass apartment) to the living room because the HB (the bastard) doesn’t have to wake up for another 2 hours, so I'm nice and don't turn on the bedroom light. I don't want to begrudge him the heavenly feeling of sleeping in, surrounded by warmth and cuddly blankets, but damn I hate to see him snuggly and sleepy while I'm struggling to wake up. It sucks.

So I wake up and it's dark inside. Then, after I'm all dressed and brushed and deodorized, I leave the apartment, ready to face another day at work. Lately, as I leave the apartment, its semi light outside. If I left five minutes earlier, it would still be mostly dark outside. If I left five minutes later it would be even brighter outside. I leave in the middle of the sun working its mojo on the previous night's shadows. Which makes the drive to work more interesting than it normally would be.

So I can change the way the morning looks to me as I leave my apartment, by leaving a few minutes earlier (which hardly ever happens) or leaving a few minutes later. But just the difference in light doesn't have the same effect as the fog did this morning. Was it just a break in the monotony that thrilled me? Or was it something else? Seeing the fog is like seeing a blanket covering your surroundings. It wasn't a thick fog. But it was enough to give me a sense of... I don't know what. A sense of separation from my surroundings. A feeling that I was in another world perhaps. Or another dimension. (I'm in the middle of a really good sci-fi book at the moment). Or maybe I just have a kinky fascination with fog.

The fog is gone, but the sky is still overcast. In the middle of july. I love it!

All in all, I have a feeling that it's going to be a kick ass day. Damn skippy!