Friday, April 13, 2007

I'm Loonzilla. Here me roar.

Work is starting to stress me out. To the point where I'm randomly busting out with my best Godzilla impression.

"AaaaaAAAaaarrrrrRRRrrrrrggggh."

Trust me, it's enchanting. Like I'm channeling the power of an ancient siren or something.

We put all this work and effort into preparing for The Big Switch Over. It was supposed to happen this past January.

It didn't happen.

We were then told that most departments would Switch Over the following year, next January. My department, along with a few others, were told we'd enjoy the Switch Over in May.

So we've been preparing.

Gearing up for the Big Heave Hoe to the Old, girding our work-loins for the Big Howdy Do to the New. It's been a pain in the ass to say the least.

But there was comfort to be found, in the Fast As Hell approaching month of May. Almost every week, starting near the end of March, has brought this realization to mind:

"Holy crap nuggets its almost May! Do you know what the means? We're almost done with this crap!!!!"

Mental Snoopy dances quickly followed.

But everything can't remain peachy and rosy and snoopy happy forever. Not in Business World.

So I'm on this conference call earlier this week, getting a refresher on one of many aspects of my new job as it will appear in Big Switch Over Land. At the end of the call, at the end of the slideshow (conference meetings via the web are awesome), the leader of the call asked if there were any questions.

No one voiced any, and I'm hoping its because they're all like me: there are too many to ask, so were do we begin? I mean, the slideshow made sense. It was all neat and simple and to the point. But it doesn't talk about what to do when a), b), c), etc goes wrong. Because nothing in the Real World is ever so neat and simple and to the point. Well, at least when you work with morons. And really, who doesn't?

Seriously. Who doesn't? I want to know where to send in my resume!

One person grunted. A few people sighed. Someone laughed in a nervous twitter. But no questions were asked. The leader of the call then said, and I swear this is a direct quote:

"It's not as bad as you think."

Gee, I feel so much better now.

Well, I did, at least until someone mentions that The Big Switch over has been postponed. Again. For a couple of months at least. So all the hectic last minute rushes we've been doing has been a waste. Because we'll have to do it all over again in a couple of months.

"AaaaaAAAaaarrrrrRRRrrrrrggggh."

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