Would you rather...

1. eat nothing but food from the ocean for the rest of your life OR nothing but food from cans for the rest of your life?

Corn in a can, peaches in a can (they were put there by a man! In a factory down town...), spam in a can... I like all of these things, but eating nothing but canned food for the rest of my life would drive me NUTS. All caps NUTS at that. I'd pick the first option on the hope that there's enough ocean critters to keep my belly entertained for the rest of my life.

2. x-ray vision OR super hearing?

X-ray vision!!! That'd be way cooler than super hearing, because as my telepathic friend Sookie knows, there are some things you're better off not hearing.

And with x-ray vision I'd be able to do a lot of fun things. Like find out what Clarke Kent's underwear preference is (boxers? briefs? commando?). And I'd make a killing on the mini-mart lotto scratcher circuit because I'd know which ones were the money paying ones.

3. one wish granted today OR three wishes granted ten years from now?

One wish granted today. Because I need money NOW!!! All caps. With infinity exclamation points.

4. have a threesome with dr. ruth and brad pitt OR jennifer garner and maury povich?

Dude, that's so easy. I wanna do me some Dr. Ruth and Brad Pitt! I'm sure Dr. Ruth knows her way around things, and Brad, well, I 'd have him dress up in his Troy/Achilles outfit and run around the room yelling, 'Take it! It's yours!'

*sigh* I think that mental image (sans the Dr of course) is going to get me through the rest of the day quite nicely.