Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Guess I missed the warning that said 'May cause involuntary Alarm Off Button Pushing.'

Well, this day officially sucks. It's only 8:10 in the morning and I feel completely confident that I can accurately file today under S for Suck.

Matthew McConaughey could come in here and say, "Penelope Cruz's broken both her legs and I want to be in a movie with you." And I might change my mind. But barring that...

So last night I had a little lot of trouble sleeping. At about 1:30 am I hopped on the internet and tried to tire myself out by reading blogs and taking complicated, thought provoking internet quizzes (see previous post). I was only able to read a couple blogs and take 1 quiz before I started feeling sleepy, but since that was the goal I felt pleased with this high achievement of success. I rewarded myself with a turning off of the computer and with a tinkling in the potty. Apparently tinkling was a bad idea. The time it took to tinkle was enough time for my brain to recharge and go into hyper active mode. My brain was jumping from point A to Q to D to 9 to... it was all over the charts with random thoughts. Why it chose to be super thoughtful at 2 in the morning I have no idea. I probably should have stayed up and explored this super thoughtful brain; I could have invented something cool like soundless Velcro! But I had to go to work. And being at work is sucky enough without the added suckiness of being tired from lack of sleep.
So I laid back in bed and tried to fall asleep, tried to shut the brain down for the night, but it was a no go. Time for Plan B. I decided to count sheep. Do you ever count sheep? If you do, do you picture the cute little Serta Counting Sheep? I do. They're the best kind to count.

So I'm laying there, picturing a cute little Serta Counting Sheep walk up to a fence and jump gaily over it. It baaaaa's and exits stage right. I repeated the process and it went a little something like this...

2 sheep ... *jump* ...baaa
3 sheep ... *jump* ...baaa
I haven't read LKH's blog in awhile. I wonder if she's posted anything interesting lately.
Arrrrrghh! No more thinking!!!!
4 sheep... *jump* ...baaa
5 sheep... *jump* ...baaa
The new Harry Potter book cover looks cool and...
Arrrrgghhh! No more thinking!!!!
6 sheep... *jump* ...baaa
7 sheep... *jump* ...baaa
Maybe I should close the window in the living room. That might help.
Arrrrgghhh! No more thinking!!!!
Where was I ... uh...
3 sheep... *jump* ...baaa
4 sheep...
Why did God have to include sinuses in the body that ache and create mucus and swell or whatever until only a miniscule amount of air can get through you nose so you can't breath right. Was it really necessary for this model (the Eve GT3000!) to include this particular feature?... Ooh that's funny. I should write that down. No, wait, if I'm thinking its funny in my current mental state then it won't seem even remotely funny tomorrow. Why am I thinking about this? I should be asleep. Come to think of it, some of my best writing has been done in this in-between state of consciousness and sleep. Some funny stuff too. Not all of its been good, but occasionally out pops a few gems. Maybe I should grab a pen and paper and see if anything good plops out... OR MAYBE I SHOULD JUST GO TO SLEEP!!!!!!!!!!!

It was at that point that I decided to take some Nyquil. It will be good for my cold and it might help me fall asleep, I thought. I swear, every other time I've taken Nyquil it hasn't effected me, drowsy wise. But this current round of allergy attack, I've taken Nyquil twice and its helped conk me out. Strange. So I thought I'd try the magic syrup again. Because maybe if I put the snot to sleep I'll fall asleep myself.

I hesitated for a moment. What if I don't wake up with my alarm, I thought. Nah, that won't happen!

[insert ominous music here that signifies big doom about to happen]

I figured I might feel drowsy in the morning, un-rested and exhausted and it might be a mighty struggle to wake up from a short spat of sleepy time that was only achieved due to the assistance of Nyquil. But I could struggle. I'd get up eventually and it'd be all good. So I took some Nyquil, closed the window in the living room, and laid back in bed. Should I set two alarms just in case the first one doesn't wake me up, I wondered. Nah, I won't need it!

[ominous music increases]

So guess what time I woke up this morning. Go ahead. Guess. (Refer back to title of post if you need a hint.)

If you guessed 'The Exact Same Time You're Shift Starts' you win a thousand bonus loonyville points (not redeemable for monetary value).

I have to be at work at 7:30 am.

I woke up at 7:30 am.


Why, oh why didn't I set that second alarm? *smacks forehead* stupid stupid stupid.

My sleep deprived drugged self turned off the frelling alarm. I'm lucky I even woke up when I did.

So I did the mad morning dash, ran out the door fully dressed and brushed and deodorized, and managed to get to work only a half hour late. Crap balls!

And it was foggy outside this morning, even at my apartment, but I was so rushed I couldn't enjoy it. Dammit. But I was only rushing up to the point I got in my car. I never rush when I'm driving to work, no matter how late I am. I've passed enough accidents on the freeways on my way to work to know its not worth it. Since it was foggy out I took a deep breath, calmed down, and made extra special care not to drive too crazy-like. Which was a good thing, because since it was later than I usually leave, kids were out and about walking to school. Kids who thought it was fun to run out into the street in the fog. Dumb asses. That was so not needed in my already frazzled state.

So I got to work a half hour late. Not too bad I guess. I thought about not clocking in, going 'oops' when my supervisor says 'hey, you for got to clock in on Wednesday'. It would be a little demerit or count against me or whatever they do around here, but he usually doesn't do anything about it because I rarely forget. (Notice I typed 'rarely' and not 'never'. Heh.) I doubt anyone noticed I wasn't here when I should have been, but just to be on the safe side in case someone was looking for me and making a big deal that I wasn't here, I clocked in. Late. Which is also grounds for a ding on the record. But I'll work my 8 hours and hopefully Mr. Supervisor Man will be cool and not want to deal with the paper work associated with dinging a late employee.

But hey, on the bright side, at least I feel refreshed and wide awake! Woo!

1 comment:

  1. ew, i hate when i shut off my alarm. whenever i take NyQuil, i make sure i have a good 6 hours, atleast, to sleep. otherwise i will either (a) sleep through the alarm, or (b) shut it off in my sleep.