Squirrels like me. Squirrels like nuts. Therefore, logically, me is nuts.

Earlier today...

DeskNeighbor P: I think I'll make a run down to the AM/PM.
ImmediateBoss F: Hey, buy me an ice cream bar while you're there.
Fantabulous Me: Mmmmm... mini mart snack food for lunch. I think I might make a trip later.

F has great taste. He wanted a Ben & Jerry's Phish Food ice cream bar. Mmmm... Phish Food. Because I voiced my love for the Phish Food, F offered to buy me one too. Yay! And because I voiced my want of a visit to the AM/PM mini mart, P said, 'wanna tag along?'

I tagged. And I drove. Because P's front seat was full of junk that would be a pain in the ass to move, or so he says. I offered to drive, because I keep all my junk neatly crammed in the back seat.

I drove us about 5 minutes down the street to the mini mart, which turned out to be all for not because they were out of the Phish Food. Damn it all to hell with a quick stop in Bumsville! They didn't even have F's back up ice cream so I said, 'Oh well.'

P was having none of that negativity so we searched for another freezer section. We found tubs of Ben & Jerry's and P went rifling through them, in search of the boss's ice cream flavor.

Me: But F said he didn't want the tub kind. Just the bar.
P: *rifle rifle rifle*

He was determined to kiss F's ass with a nice tub of Phish Food and wasn't going to hear anything from me that would undermine his mission. Nah, that's not it. He was just being nice. And ignoring my fact-stating self at the same time. F said several times "just the bar, not the tub." When P didn't find any Phish Food, bar or tub, we hopped into my car, then hopped onto the freeway and drove about 10 minutes or so to find a nearby super market. I didn't mind so much though. It was like going on a field trip! Wheeeee! (Yes, I'm easily amused.)

At Ralph's Grocery Store they had the right B&J's ice cream, but I felt weird making F buy me a tub of ice cream, even though it was one of those mini tubs. I wouldn't have minded a free 'about a dollar' ice cream bar, but anything else I would have felt obligated to buy myself. And I didn't want the Phish Food that bad. Close, but not quite. Instead of ice cream I picked up a yummy chicken salad sandwich from the deli section. P grabbed a sandwich and a soda and carried it with the ice cream to the check out counter. All that and a bag of chips. (Heh!) We decided to share a bag of Ruffles. Because they have ridges. Ridged for my tastebuds' pleasure.

By the time we got back to the office we were kind of late. Us peons only get a half hour for lunch and this ice cream mission took a little bit longer than that. I don't think anyone noticed though. And if they did, they didn't mind. Which kind of lessens the thrill of being a long-lunch taking rebel. Maybe I should take an extra long coffee break. And go sit out on the lawn in front of the building, basking in the sun, staring up at an almost smog-free baby blue sky, swapping rebel stories with the squirrels...

Anyway, in review:

Driving all over the place in search of ice cream: $1.79/gallon of gas
A yummy sandwich and Dr. Pepper for lunch: $5.48
Wasting an hour outside on such a beautiful day when I should be at work: priceless