Tuesday is Chooseday

Would you rather...

1. Your family and friends find out that you have downloaded (from the internet) instructions on how to make a bomb OR midget fetish porn?

I would rather my friends think I'm downloading bomb instructions. My excuse for either one could be 'I was just curious.' But that's not necessarily a good excuse. So I'd tell them, 'I was doing research for my book!' I'd rather they think I was writing some thriller where the good guys have to find the bad guys then disarm a bomb than writing some thriller where the good guys are looking for some bad guy who dabbles in midget fetish porn.

Actually... I wonder if I can use that last one in my next story... hmm....

2. Make your living emptying other people's garbage OR giving sumo wrestlers massages?

I would rather give sumo wrestlers massages. It would teach me some good massage techniques, and I'd build up some really strong hands working the kinks out of all that flesh. Then I'd be all set to compete in the national arm wrestler's competition. And kick ass! Woo! Then I'd be able to scratch off another item from my Things To Do Before I Die list.

3. Run naked through your grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary OR through your best friend's wedding?

I'd rather run naked through my grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary. I think my family would be more forgiving. Slightly more. Plus, most of the relatives that would show up to the anniversary party would be a lot older than the guests that would show up at my best friend's wedding, so the hideous memory of my streaking flesh wouldn't last as long. A lot older meaning they'll likely be taking that memory to their grave a lot faster.

4. Find a tree that will only grow in Chicago that grows money, but only grows Chilean Pesos OR only grows Icelandic Kronur?

Well, if I'm reading the conversion calculations correctly (and there's a BIG margin of error here folks) then I'd rather find a tree that only grows Icelandic Kronur. To convert the money into US dollars, I'd need less of Kronur to do so. It would take about 661 chilean pesos and 100 icelandic kronur to get a US dollar. I'd rather be carrying the smaller amount around. Plus, since there's less to produce per dollar, that means more dollars!

Anyone know where I can find this tree??? Either one???