Thursday, April 28, 2005

Interoffice Memo Time Revisited

FROM : Everyone Within Hearing Range Of Thoughtless Coworker's Office.
TO : Thoughtless Coworker
RE : The Intolerable Abandonment Of Your Cell Phone With The Annoying Ringtone

Stop it.

Please, for the love of all things small and fuzzy stop it now!

You keep leaving your cell phone on your desk when you run off to meetings or lunch or whatever. This wouldn't be a problem, really, if people didn't call you. Which they do. Every single time you leave your phone behind. Without fail! And these people that call you? They leave messages.

Have you heard the message ringtone on your phone? It's not that bad the first time you hear it. But the twentieth plus time in a row? Pure torture!

Of course you have the volume on the loudest setting. And of course you've added super sonic speakers so that everyone upstairs can hear the incessant, ear-bleedingly-annoying message ringtone as it plays over and over and over again. The damn thing goes off every thirty seconds.

Every. Thirty. Seconds!!!

Bitch, turn off your phone! Arrrrrrrgggggggggggggg!!!!!!!!!

Due to severe agitation and emotional distress, we are not liable for any cell phone breakage or voice message interuptus that may occur.

Your Highly Agitated Coworkers


Wait a minute? Is it Annoy Lisa Day?

Oh. That's right ... The above office memo should be signed, 'Your Highly Agitated and Premenstrual Coworkers'

For some reason, for this ride on the PMS Rollercoaster of Fun, I am in a highly agitated state of being. More so than usual.

Today, I am full of the grrrrrrrrrr.

I think it would be prudent to warn the HB. Maybe get him a card? If they don't make Hallmark cards for such an occasion, they should.

Front of Card :
To my wonderful [ boyfriend / husband / significant other/ sex slave / etc ]

Inside of Card:
Roses are Red
Violets are Blue
I am PMS-ing hardcore
And will rip your fucking head off if you so much as look at me like I'm overreacting about anything.

You have been warned.

And then I could sign it 'with all my love'. Heh. Maybe add a bunch of smiley faces and x's and o's. And doodle a bunch of hearts all over the place. That'd be a nice touch I think.

1 comment:

  1. Heh, her cell phone was incredibly annoying! How did she respond to the memo....come on, i know you sent it!